Healing Through Words: Body Image

Body, let me understand you

let me know why you react the way you do

move the way you do

change the way you do

I wanted you to stay the same

but you decided to change

And change I am not afraid of

but you changed so much,

Until I couldn’t recognize my face

I’ve had to take off my rings

and donate my clothes

and accept that my favorite pants don’t go up my thighs anymore

I’ve cut off my hair and dyed it more than once

that was never the answer

it only led me on.

and it hurts to think and know that I liked myself better then,

that it’s hard to let go.

that I am waiting on her to come back to me

I wish I could close my eyes and be her again.

and maybe you wanted to protect me from things I don’t know

you changing has forced myself to grow

Mentally I’ve been low

Forced to see myself in ways I have never seen before.

I wish I recognized my beauty then

that I appreciated her more.

I wish I saw what I now see

Maybe there’s a future where I do the same for me,

Me right now

that tries to be happy with who she is.

She is brave, she is smart, she has done hard things for sure

She is so, so much more than a size at a store.

So body know that I am trying

everyday.

to love every part of you, every part of me

I will cry and heal and let it all out

Until I feel the love you give me, day in and day out

I guess I should say I am sorry for all the days I have looked at you

and then looked away

now I am trying to love you, not just then, not just a little, but all the way.

You are my safe space, you are my home.

You and I forever, there’s no other place to go.

We fight and we laugh and may we grow old.

Body let me love you as you are, now and forevermore.